Auditions !!!

(from 15th June 2009)

Afternoon!!

I've just back from my audition at Lambert's School of Creative Arts... and wow!!
It's like the poshest 'school' I've ever seen, nothing like my high school - its only decoration being the scrawled graffiti which covered every inch of the walls and desks. 'Wozza woz ere 4eva'
I mean seriously... that doesn't even make sense does it?

I had been praticing my audition speech for weeks, in front of the mirror, to my Mum, my Dad, the Cat (although I don't think he was interested) and the parrot (who had actually learned some of the lines himself) and I think everyone was getting a little bit fed up with me.

I arrived early and had to wait on my own for like 15 minutes when finally another auditionee turned up. A painfully beautiful boyshape came to join me in the waiting area.
'Hello there.' His voice was crisp and clear as crystal. 'Are you here for the audition?' I had never heard people speak like him in real life, only on TV. A few seconds passed by before I could find my own voice.
'Um... yeah. They just told me to wait here.' I suddenly became aware of my Mancunian accent and cringed.
'What monologues are you doing?' He didnt take his eyes off me once and I started to fidget with my skirt. I worried that I was covered in cat hair and couldn't help feel awkward sitting next to this elegant boy in his pressed trousers and what I could only guess was a designer shirt of some sort.
'Um...' I remembered what he just said. 'Did you say monologues? As in more than one? Well I'm doing something from Cooking with Elvis by Lee Hall. He's the guy who did Billy Elliot.'
'Yes, I know of Lee Hall.' Duh, of course he would. 'Which Shakespeare piece are you going perform?' I stared at him in horror.
'Shakespeare?! Are you serious? I thought we only had to do one monologue.' I was starting to rant but I couldn't stop. 'I'm not going to get in. I can't tell my parents. I may as well just go home now. I knew I shouldn't have auditioned here. Gah! I'm so stupid!'
'Woah, calm down. You will be ok. I promise.' He tried to soothe me but I was beyond worried. I hadn't even noticed that the waiting lounge had started to fill up and suddenly a tall, thin, pointy looking woman appeared from nowhere. She had a shawl casually thrown around her shoulders and her long, dark hair flowed down her back like water.
'Ok performers! Simmer down.' She clapped her hands twice and everyone turned to look at her. 'Due to incompetent staff we are now running late and unable to take you on the grand tour, but for those of you talented enough to succeed... well you will see Lambert's in September won't you. It is just unfortunate you can't all see it.' My heart dropped out of my stomach and landed somewhere in one of my feet, I wasn't going to make it.
'Follow me and we shall crack straight on with the auditions.' In the classroom a register was called and when we were all present the pointy tutor called on the first person to deliver their monologues... or monologue in my case.

'Cherry Bakewell?' Damn! I knew there was a reason for hating my name, I was first on the list. 'Is that your real name?' Now I hated it even more, a few people in the group sniggered.
'Um, yes Miss.' I mumbled.
'Very well then. I do hope you will speak clearly when you deliver your monologue and speaking of which, what delight have you chosen for us today?' I told her my choice and waited for instructions.
'And have you prepared a Shakespeare piece?' The question I had been dreading.
'No.' I couldn't think of an excuse that sounded good enough and decided not to bother. She pursed her lips and took a deep breath.
'Well, then i guess it is a good job we do not have time for two monoglogues from everyone isn't it Cherry Bakewell?' I couldn't help but wonder if I could have lied and said yes.
'When you are ready.' Although my knees were shaking I managed to perform the best I had done it so far and I could have sworn I saw Pointy Face smile slightly at the end, she almost seemed shocked.

After some people had performed she presented them with a blank expression and one or two were even frowned at, she shook her head a few times too. It was finally time for the posh boy to do his. Turns out his name is Alexander Christian Van Sant but he told Pointy Face that Alex was fine. His audition piece was from Romeo and Juliet, Mercutio's 'Queen Mab' speech. He was amazing. The only person in the whole group to receive applause from the tutor. She quietly said 'very good' because she's not supposed to make her feelings about the auditions known, but I am pretty sure she loved it.

Once we were free to go I looked around for Alex to congratulate him but he had already left so I grabbed my bag and headed towards town. All the way there I kept running through the past two hours and trying to decided how I felt about it. Had I made it in? Was I good? Did she like it or had I just made a terrible impression on the head of the performing arts course? I still can't tell. She smiled but I don't know... maybe she just had wind. Guess I will just have to wait and see.

I decided to spend some money in town before going home, I deserved it. Whether that was because I had done well or because I wasn't going to get in I didn't know, either way retail therapy was in order. I bought three new plectrums for my bass guitar, a diary/scrapbooky thing, a nutty muffin and a Massimo Caramel Latte with soya milk from Costa Coffee, and that was all my money gone! It was an amazing latte though so I don’t mind too much.

The highlight of my shopping trip came when I was standing at the bus stop waiting to go home, a scruffy looking man staggered over to me. He smelled really bad, kind of like a cross between out-of-date stilton and Deagan’s t-shirt after football practice. The closer he got the more my eyes watered. I could see bits of food in his beard, there were two definite baked beans and some unidentifiable crumbs scattered around his mouth. Under his arm was a scraggy old blanket, quite full of holes just like his pants. So he staggered over to me mumbling in some… language, I had no idea what he was saying. I could smell strong alcohol on his breath and even stronger mould. Suddenly he scream-slurred at me, ‘Eeeaaaaaare Loooooveeeyy! Get thi selth a coffee!’ Then thrust a £1 coin into my hand and walked away!

I was given money by a drunken, smelly, old homeless man with baked beans in his beard! I knew I was having a bad hair day but seriously, do I look that bad? When the bus came I caught sight of my reflection in the window and realised my eyeliner was smudged down one side of my face and that I had a scattering of muffin crumbs nestled in my tangled, pink, candyfloss hair. When did that happen? I seriously should have checked a mirror before my audition!

Please wish me luck, it's obvious I'm gonna need it.

Love and Ribbons,
Cherry
[)o